Archive for the ‘About Amanda’ Category

Can anyone be happy and go lucky every single day?

Lately, I find myself wondering about the state of living and I find it hard to remain positive.  It’s like I’m on the edge of a plate, balancing and not wanting to fall off.

I’ve been made redundant in the past, but this time it is a lot scarier.  I daren’t even turn on the news because it is all gloom and doom as they talk about the economy and the recession.  I’m finding it very hard to even get an interview and within a month, my money is going to run out and I’ll be hit left, right and centre with bills and debt.

The only thing that keeps me going is knowing that I’m not alone.  I absolutely refuse to be bogged down by it, but I admit that lately, I do feel degraded.

It’s quite funny really, because I’ve often thought that I should write a blog about how I feel, then I think that I shouldn’t because  I don’t want to depress you with my worries, but sometimes, you just have to get it off your chest.

It’s been about two months since I last did a day’s work and during this time, I’ve kept myself busy working on promoting my photography and creating customisable cards that are available within my Zazzle store.  Shameless promotion I know, but please please buy from me if you’re in need of a business card, greeting card of Halloween invitation card.

I’m making new friends all the time on Twitter and this is keeping me occupied rather than dwelling on the negative.  I’ve gotten to know some great people and I especially enjoy the Fewdio gang.  Their love of horror really does inspire mine.  I can’t wait to see what their next nightmare will be.  Do check them out at http://www.fewdio.com.

I’ve learned that I’m very dependent on having the Internet and I would hate to lose it.  The thought of getting disconnected scares me more than not having money to buy food.  Isn’t that crazy?

I’m 37yrs old and by the end of this year I will be a grandma.  I don’t like the word ‘grandma’ as it is so old fashioned.  I can’t think of a trendy name to replace ‘granny Mandy’.  Help?

I’ve got so many things really to look forward to, hence why I don’t want to give in to the hardship of living.  I’ve also got the support of my gorgeous partner Luke who is also out of work.

My photography is my passion and trying to promote it is a job in itself and right now I can work on it full time.  This is what is keeping me going and hopefully it will all be worthwhile?

Rant over! 

I’m not mad or crazy, but what I’m about to tell you is true.

One dark evening many years ago, I had the strong urge to peep out of the curtains into my garden. I don’t know why I had to look, but I did and what I seen, terrified me.

The picture you see is my vision of what I seen, standing there silently on the other side of my back fence behind the shrubbery.

I watched the extremely tall figure for a minute or so. He was just stood there side on to me, looking forward. At first I thought it was a madman, checking out someone before he made his move until his head turned very slowly to look directly at me. I s**t myself!

I got a large kitchen knife and sneaked out of my front door and ran to my friend’s house.

Some months later, can’t exactly remember when, my daughter had her friend sleep over. They became hysterical due a man outside their bedroom window. My garden is fenced off and although that wouldn’t stop an intruder, it would make it difficult.

When describing the man, my daughter sent chills down my spine, because all she could comment on was his long black curly hair. The figure I had seen had long curly hair.

On another occasion, my niece came running out of my bathroom insisting that she had seen a man outside the bathroom window. She could only see a shape, but it terrified her.

I’m not saying that this is the same man that has been spotted on each occasion and there is probably a rational explanation. All I know is that, what I seen just didn’t come across as human.

The sighting troubles me to this day, because when I used to go to bed, I always sensed a dark male presence hiding in the shadows of my bedroom, watching over me. His sexual presence was overpowering. I once and only once had such a vivid erotic dream about him and I still question to this day if it was real or not.

My friend suggested that it could be someone who has astral projected. Could be I suppose?

Years later, I went to see a medium that had a good reputation. She told me that I had a powerful dark guardian watching over me and that I will be forever protected. Was this dark guardian the presence that hid in the shadows of my bedroom?

I guess I will never know and yes I have been accused of having an over active imagination, but I am one of the biggest sceptics around and I can’t find a plausible explanation for what I have seen and experienced all those years ago.

Yes I’m sorry even before I begin this post, but I do kill big spiders if I’m able to and I don’t pass out with fear first.

I’ve been nicknamed ‘The Resident Spider Slayer’ on Twitter by the wonderful author ‘Angela Caperton’, because over the past 3 days, me and my partner have seen 4 big spiders, 3 of those in the house.

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Childhood Fear

I can’t sit or sleep in a room if I know that there is a spider on the loose. It really sends the chills running up my spine and I think I have my mother to blame for my spider fear.

When I was about 8 yrs old, I was sitting in the living room one night, quietly watching the television when all of a sudden, my mother jumps up on the couch in a screaming hysterical rant.

‘SPIDER! SPIDER!’

I bet my eyes grew to the size of saucers as I copied her and stood up on my chair, examining the carpet for the eight legged monster, while still listening to my mother wail.

All of a sudden, a heavy book landed on the carpet with a sickening thud and I swear down to this day that I heard the spider go crunch. I didn’t need my ranting mother to scream about the sound it made. She wasn’t happy that she had killed it. She was ready to cart me and my sisters off to a hotel for the evening, because she couldn’t lift the book up let alone remove the remains.

It stayed there until a kind neighbour removed it for her.

The Spider Mop Affair

Since getting my own place, I’ve had to learn to tackle these hideous creatures.  Small ones, I can put up with just about.  I’ve even managed to put them in cups and put them outside, but the big ones with horrid legs and fat bodies, no way!

A few years ago, I was in the process of decorating my living room, which meant the walls were bare and there were no curtains up. It was night time and my living room backs onto the main street.

I got up from the couch and I spotted it out of the corner of my eye. It was humongous, right above the black window. The entire world could see me and I couldn’t see them, but I just froze in fear with a cold sweat starting. What was I going to do?

The Spider Mop made its first appearance and has been a faithful friend ever since. It keeps one at arm’s length should you accidentally miss the horrid creature.

I ran for the ‘Spider Mop’ and returned to find the ‘thing’ still there above the window. I kept my eyes on it while I steadily opened the window wide, because I needed somewhere to throw the mop if successful.

Time to hit the sucker!

I climbed up on the couch, in full view of everyone who might have been looking in. I held the mop steadily while daring myself to smack it hard. I knew that there was a strong chance that I would only catch its leg and that it would run or even worse, fall on the floor and go missing.

The sweat had now broken out on my forehead as I remained poised with the mop in the air, daring myself to smack it. After about 5 minutes I knew that I had to take my chance.

SMACK!!!!

I held the mop on the wall where I had hit it. Heartbeat was pounding in my chest as I stared to see if I could see any of the spider’s legs moving and guess what? Three legs appeared!

SMACK! SMACK! SMACK!

I held the mop on the wall for about another 5 minutes and I didn’t care if people were watching me. I slowly moved the mop and saw no movement while I directed the mop to the open window. I then threw the mop outside and it never came back in.

Here’s the colour version of my self vampire portrait, in glorious technicolour for all to see, hahahaha!

Some time ago while visiting Manchester Road Cemetery in Warrington, I had a very strong feeling that I was being watched.

While scanning the scene of dark headstones, some leaning at precarious angles about to fall, I had the vision that something was amongst them, looking back at me. I couldn’t see anything!

Of course I was feeling a bit on edge, as I stood there alone. The only sounds that broke the deathly silence were the twittering of hidden birds.

I was creeping myself out, so I carried on walking the path of death, looking for my next photo opportunity.

A few months later, I returned and suddenly, the strong feeling of being watched returned, but this time there seemed to be more urgency.

I was on the main road that led up to the little chapel taking photographs of the monuments, when I was forced to turn around to catch whoever or whatever was nearby.

I can’t fully describe what I felt, but it was like an invisible force sped right past me, my eyes following nothing as whatever it was ventured towards the chapel. I wasn’t scared and I’ve not felt anything like that since in that particular cemetery.

There is one cemetery that really creeps me out!

St James Cemetery, Liverpool, Merseyside

It is St James Cemetery in Liverpool, Merseyside, where over fifty thousand Victorian dead have been laid to rest in a sunken churchyard in a former sandstone quarry.

I don’t know what it is about this place, but it has a dark, oppressive atmosphere, which doesn’t scare me. It makes me feel very uncomfortable!

I suppose it’s the fact that the majority of the headstones have been uprooted and placed along the path circling the cemetery, so it now looks like a park. Why was the decision made to do this?

Within this cemetery, you will find walled tombs and archways that were once the gateway in and some have been bricked up.

On some of the remaining headstones at one end of the cemetery, you will find Masonic symbols and an empty area that is guarded by a locked gate. Why?

The only graffiti on the walls is ‘Lost boys’ that adds to the eeriness of this place.

 

 

Within Tom Slemen’s book titled, ‘Liverpool Ghost Walk ’, he mentions that the site of St James Cemetery was revered by Wiccans and that it has a dark association with a legendary Lancashire witch named Jenna Green, later known as Ginny Greenteeth, who was cast out of her coven for some unknown reason. Ginny Greenteeth was said to prowl river banks and streams and there is a subterranean stream beneath the cemetery.

Perhaps it’s because I’ve read Tom’s book that I feel uneasy when visiting this cemetery, but I seriously recommend reading this book, because there are numerous tales of ghastly goings on within this cemetery and mention of occult symbols that have been etched into the sandstone walls.

Ghosts Caught on Camera?

Many years ago when I first began to enjoy taking photographs of graves and tombs, I took a snapshot of a tomb in the grounds of St Elphin’s Parish in Warrington.

It stands out a mile to me that there appears to be two male heads looking back at me.  They’re peeking just above the nearest tomb.  Can you see them?

The full image is below.

More photographs from the cemeteries featured above can be viewed by clicking the links below.  Feel free to comment on the photos as feedback is much appreciated.

Graveyards and Cemeteries- Warrington Gallery

Graveyards and Cemeteries – Liverpool Gallery